Week 23: Napalm Death – Scum

21 Jan


Yeahhhh I finally got my grind/metal fix. I don’t know. I really love some bits of this record, but others just sound like a big old hiss of cymbals. Like one of those wind-up monkeys on speed.

I’m  a total philistine when it comes to heavy metal to be honest. I like flashy bands with big hair and tight trousers, and dirty groove-driven sleaze-rock, and the other stuff I can just sort of sit and appreciate but never really love. A lot of the classic bands like Metallica just leave me cold. If I hadn’t spent most of my life utterly ensconced in the world of heavy music through going to rock clubs and being friends with a lot of smelly tattooed vegans, I’d probably feel the same way about metal as I do about jazz. Mmmm, yeah, nice, I can see what you’re doing there and it’s very clever. It doesn’t toast my nuts though.

Unless it’s Iron Maiden. Waaaaaiiiilllll!

Anyway, it has been Snowing here in such a way that I feel I need to capitalise the word. I did try to drive to the office but it was a bit scary so I’ve finally tackled the complex world of remote access. I had all sorts of grand plans about working from home, most of which involved not doing very much actual work at all (watching a nice film, painting my toenails, having a bubble bath) but sadly none of them came to pass as it turns out I’m still expected to do stressful amounts of tedious bobbins. It was comforting to have a cat on hand to cuddle when I had to phone horrible people though.

The other thing I’d forgotten about “the home office” (laptop, sofa) is that I feel compelled to eat more or less constantly in spite of not doing any actual movement. This is compounded by it being cold and snowy. Who can nibble a salad when it’s like the bloody Chronicles of ruddy Narnia outside? Not this lady. Who can get their car out of the snowdrift to get to the gym? Not I. Consequently I am rounding off a day of peanut butter sandwiches and cereal bars with a fat jacket and beans. I can get away with this when I’m pregnant, right? It’s not like I have to be a fat bridesmaid in a fortnight is it? Is it?


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